Thursday, February 25, 2010

The One Thing I've Learned...

The one thing I've learned through distance,
is that in order for the relationship to work,
both partners have to trust
Have to listen. 
And have to speak.  

Trust is the hardest of these three for me.
There's always that little, annoying voice wayyy back in my head that likes to think of every possible bad situation.
My heart knows the truth, but my head needs to be reminded.

Once you've been hurt, it's to not let that effect future, similar situations.
But I believe the situation is different now. I know it is.
And my heart knows it is. My head is still so skeptical.

With any relationship, you must listen.
Especially in a distance relationship.
This is so vital because you can't see the other person, so in order to understand what they're going through, you must listen to them trying to explain.  Don't push. That'll scare them away.
Be gentle, understanding, patient.
Listen closely, remember what they said, ask them questions about it.
Don't just rush into your story, show them you care. Listen to them first.

Believe it or not, I have almost as much trouble speaking as I do trusting.
As I've mentiond before, maybe it's the lack of "connection" because it's through a computer screen.
Maybe I'm afraid someone, other than him, is listening to me open up
Or maybe it's because I'm letting my past effect my future.
And that is WRONG.

The past is past, I need to move on. I need to fully trust again. I need to speak, telling him everything that is really is going on inside of me.

He can't listen when I don't speak, resulting in a lack of trust with both of us.

This is what I've learned, but this is what I'm still working on.
The battle isn't over yet.

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